Several charitable organizations in Pleasantville provide opportunities for teenagers to engage in community service. These organizations have a great need for volunteers, but in recent years, the number of teenage volunteers has significantly declined.
The Pleasantville School Board should take measures to increase the number of volunteers. Teachers, parents, and other community members agree that it is important for young people to learn the value of community service. Requiring high school students to engage in community service would provide much-needed assistance to worthy local charities and would also help young people understand the importance of giving back to their community. For this reason, the Pleasantville School Board should institute a program requiring students of Pleasantville High School to complete 40 hours of community service prior to graduation.
Community service is important part of life, one should learn to help other without any selfish motive. There are many organizaions working for this cause, and they are always in need for volunteers. As per the authors analysis in the town of Pleasantvile the teenage volunteers is declined in recent years. So, as per author's suggestion adding a mendatory 40 hour of community service prior to graduation in Pleasantvile School Board will answer the issue. Although the suggestion is quite comprehensive and cogent but there are many underlying assumptions, whoch are needs to be answered before implementing it.
First assumption the author made is that, the charitable organizations are in need of teenage volunteers. Although they are always in need of volunteers, there might be some age groupm and gender specific demands. For instance, the oraganization working for women empowerment might need more women volunteers and matured enough to understand the issue of women empowerment, they might not be interested in the teenagers. From the agrument it is not certain that the organization are in need of teenage volunteers. In addition, it is also not articulated that whether the total number of volunteers are increased or decreased, just because teenage participation is low, does not affect the other age groups.
Another noteworthy assumption is 40 hours of community service is enough to fulfill the need of charitable oranizations, and it is also prior to their graduation which spans for 2 years. Before going further it is esssential to confer that this much time is sufficient for organization. Generally the oraganizations are in need of volunteers on specific day, or for specific event. For example, the organization working for spreading knowledge of HIV-AIDS, might need more volunteers on the AIDS-day then any other day in a year. Given the choice of 40 hours anytime till the graduation might not help requiring organizations on their peak events or when they are in peak demands.
Moreover, the author assumed that are related to the interest of teenagers. It is not clear that the oranization working for which cause, to craete a sense of responsibility people should connect with the cause. To create the teenager more responsible citizens, they need to connect with the cause enthusiastically not due to mendation in curriculum. Teenagers can more connect to the organization working for wildlife safety, childern safety, or for the livelihood of blind people, They might not able to connect with the organization working for global peace, TB elimination, and etc.
In summary, before going further with the suggetion the author made, it is mendatory to answer all assumptions, else even after providing the sufficient teenage force, the problem will stay the same. The good practice is to involve the needy organizations in implementation and articualtion of new policy.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: There are many organizaions working for this cause, and they are always in need for volunteers.
Error: organizaions Suggestion: organizations
Sentence: So, as per author's suggestion adding a mendatory 40 hour of community service prior to graduation in Pleasantvile School Board will answer the issue.
Error: mendatory Suggestion: mandatory
Sentence: Although the suggestion is quite comprehensive and cogent but there are many underlying assumptions, whoch are needs to be answered before implementing it.
Error: whoch Suggestion: which
Sentence: Although they are always in need of volunteers, there might be some age groupm and gender specific demands.
Error: groupm Suggestion: group
Sentence: For instance, the oraganization working for women empowerment might need more women volunteers and matured enough to understand the issue of women empowerment, they might not be interested in the teenagers.
Error: empowerment Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: oraganization Suggestion: organization
Sentence: From the agrument it is not certain that the organization are in need of teenage volunteers.
Error: agrument Suggestion: argument
Sentence: Another noteworthy assumption is 40 hours of community service is enough to fulfill the need of charitable oranizations, and it is also prior to their graduation which spans for 2 years.
Error: oranizations Suggestion: organizations
Sentence: Before going further it is esssential to confer that this much time is sufficient for organization.
Error: esssential Suggestion: essential
Sentence: Generally the oraganizations are in need of volunteers on specific day, or for specific event.
Error: oraganizations Suggestion: organizations
Sentence: It is not clear that the oranization working for which cause, to craete a sense of responsibility people should connect with the cause.
Error: oranization Suggestion: organization
Error: craete Suggestion: crate
Sentence: To create the teenager more responsible citizens, they need to connect with the cause enthusiastically not due to mendation in curriculum.
Error: mendation Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Teenagers can more connect to the organization working for wildlife safety, childern safety, or for the livelihood of blind people, They might not able to connect with the organization working for global peace, TB elimination, and etc.
Error: childern Suggestion: children
Error: wildlife Suggestion: willing
Error: etc. Suggestion: etch
Sentence: In summary, before going further with the suggetion the author made, it is mendatory to answer all assumptions, else even after providing the sufficient teenage force, the problem will stay the same.
Error: suggetion Suggestion: suggestion
Error: mendatory Suggestion: mandatory
Sentence: The good practice is to involve the needy organizations in implementation and articualtion of new policy.
Error: articualtion Suggestion: articulation
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 18 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 463 350
No. of Characters: 2386 1500
No. of Different Words: 214 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.639 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.153 4.6
Word Length SD: 3.003 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 168 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 133 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 74 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.048 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.835 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.429 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.303 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.53 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.067 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 201, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...they are always in need for volunteers. As per the authors analysis in the town of...
^^
Line 1, column 212, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ways in need for volunteers. As per the authors analysis in the town of Pleasantvile th...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 309, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[4]
Message: “So , as” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...volunteers is declined in recent years. So, as per authors suggestion adding a mendato...
^^^^^^
Line 1, column 361, Rule ID: CD_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun 'hour' seems to be countable, so consider using: 'hours'.
Suggestion: hours
...uthors suggestion adding a mendatory 40 hour of community service prior to graduatio...
^^^^
Line 5, column 603, Rule ID: ADVISE_VBG[5]
Message: The verb 'help' is used with infinitive: 'to require' or 'require'.
Suggestion: to require; require
...time till the graduation might not help requiring organizations on their peak events or w...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 579, Rule ID: AND_ETC[1]
Message: Use simply 'etc.'.
Suggestion: etc.
...rking for global peace, TB elimination, and etc. In summary, before going further wi...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 587, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r global peace, TB elimination, and etc. In summary, before going further with th...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, moreover, so, then, thus, for example, for instance, in addition, in summary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 19.6327345309 148% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 12.9520958084 154% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 23.0 28.8173652695 80% => OK
Preposition: 63.0 55.5748502994 113% => OK
Nominalization: 25.0 16.3942115768 152% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2448.0 2260.96107784 108% => OK
No of words: 463.0 441.139720559 105% => OK
Chars per words: 5.28725701944 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63868890866 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.07411478251 2.78398813304 110% => OK
Unique words: 215.0 204.123752495 105% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.464362850972 0.468620217663 99% => OK
syllable_count: 768.6 705.55239521 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.8105072353 57.8364921388 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 116.571428571 119.503703932 98% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0476190476 23.324526521 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.66666666667 5.70786347227 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.328431244893 0.218282227539 150% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.102312467894 0.0743258471296 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0748419478768 0.0701772020484 107% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.178775724922 0.128457276422 139% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0591095891619 0.0628817314937 94% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.5 14.3799401198 101% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.69 48.3550499002 84% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.1 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.4 12.5979740519 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.07 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 98.500998004 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 12.3882235529 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.