Essay Topic 15: Formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
Education is the fundamental requirement of a community to develop. It provides opportunities to open people’s mind to achieve their goals and empower them to scrutinize and propose solutions to problems. Therefore, formal education is designed to free the mind and spirit constructively. However, some argue that it restricts our minds and inhibits thinking freely.
First of all, formal education is designed by the government and the associated academics to unite/coalesce the members of the society into one body functioning properly. If education is left free on people to decide, it may lead to instability within the society which is counterproductive. The formal education aims to extend people’s understanding of life and environment to make careful choices and scientific researches. For instance, helping them to contemplate openly and tackle problems. Formal education in engineering majors in Iran; for instance, encompasses English and management courses which would expand engineering students’ perspectives about the demands of the organizations and feasible solutions in crisis of their career in the future.
Moreover, education assists people to make a collectively similar attitudes and understanding of the environment. As a result, the main purpose of education system lies in making people realize each others’ contribution to the society and have open minds toward learning. Besides, most formal education curriculum requires engagement in a number of “free choice” courses. Such flexibility in educational system assures students to broaden their knowledge and learn their favorite skills and sciences.
However, some may argue that formal education embodies examinations, homework, etc. in which students are taught to get good scores and this way inhibits the real learning process and their minds to think freely. Students accept the one’s hypothesis rather than questioning them to achieve good scores. Formal education also discourages students to take risks in their life and take different paths. For instance, Bill Gates, we known for the Microsoft products, dropped out of school to follow his own interest. If he had not taken risk of leaving university, he could not have been successful as he is today. Also, Elbert Einstein and Thomas Edison were dropped out of school for their poor performance at schools while they could accomplish great successes later and we today know them as the revolutionary scientists.
In conclusion, formal education provides opportunities for students to learn various majors and realize their environment better so as to broaden their knowledge and perspective. While others may think formal education discourage students from thinking freely and creatively by instilling them to accept the determined educational students to fulfill their goals.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 11, column 435, Rule ID: PRP_PAST_PART[1]
Message: Possible grammatical error. You used a past participle without using any required verb ('be' or 'have'). Did you mean 'knew'?
Suggestion: knew
...ent paths. For instance, Bill Gates, we known for the Microsoft products, dropped out...
^^^^^
Line 15, column 130, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...rs and realize their environment better so as to broaden their knowledge and perspective...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, however, if, may, moreover, so, still, therefore, while, as to, for instance, in conclusion, as a result, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 19.5258426966 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.4196629213 48% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 14.8657303371 148% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.3162921348 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 29.0 33.0505617978 88% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 58.6224719101 94% => OK
Nominalization: 25.0 12.9106741573 194% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2447.0 2235.4752809 109% => OK
No of words: 424.0 442.535393258 96% => OK
Chars per words: 5.77122641509 5.05705443957 114% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.53775939005 4.55969084622 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.17510560648 2.79657885939 114% => OK
Unique words: 228.0 215.323595506 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.537735849057 0.4932671777 109% => OK
syllable_count: 754.2 704.065955056 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59117977528 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.10617977528 129% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.38483146067 46% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.2370786517 109% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 48.8454511615 60.3974514979 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.227272727 118.986275619 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.2727272727 23.4991977007 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.59090909091 5.21951772744 126% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 10.2758426966 117% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.13820224719 136% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.162501663512 0.243740707755 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0556561448804 0.0831039109588 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0341127680697 0.0758088955206 45% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.101318287478 0.150359130593 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0307851305563 0.0667264976115 46% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.4 14.1392134831 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 35.27 48.8420337079 72% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.1 12.1743820225 108% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 16.19 12.1639044944 133% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.46 8.38706741573 113% => OK
difficult_words: 131.0 100.480337079 130% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 11.8971910112 88% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.7820224719 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.