Nations should pass laws to preserve any remaining wilderness areas in their natural state. Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
In these days, the natural resources in our world, such as lands or wild animals, have been destroyed, making the ecosystem imbalanced. The prompt suggests that the government should endorse a law that could protect remaining wilderness areas in their natural state and valuable natural resources. In my opinion, I strongly agree with this prompt for two reasons.
To begin, the natural states of the wilderness areas are important because these areas could be the habitat for many wild animals, including nearly extinct species. These animals seem to have no relevance to a human's life; however, they have a greater role than we think. They balance the ecosystem and food chain, which make our world abundant in resources. If some animal species become extinct, their predators may also go extinct due to a lack of food, resulting in a decrease in the population of this species. Indeed, one species that goes extinct will affect another species and the ecosystem. In order to preclude this situation, the government should pass a law that prevents invasion by people. This approach could stop people from destroying natural states and hunting rare animals for sale, for example. If there is no legislation to control the human invasion, the natural area may be destroyed. The abundance of resources, consequently, will disappear.
Secondly, natural states are not only valuable for animals but also difficult to recover when they are destroyed. It may take several years to fully recover. For instance, in Thailand, there is an island that is popular for sightseeing, and the natives saw an opportunity to generate income and organize tourism in this island area. The tourism takes away the natural state of the island by consuming a large number of resources, disturbing the sea animals, and leaving garbage on the island; then, the island begins to wane and is not as beautiful as in the past. Many organizations take part in recovering this island by, for example, cleaning the sandshore and taking care of sea animals. Although this island has a better environment, it is not the same as in the past, and it never could be. Moreover, recovering the island takes effort and resources as well. Why do we have to spend money and resources to bring back nature rather than prevent it? The law may play a role in controlling tourism to prevent overconsumption of the resources of the natural areas. In the end, we will not lose this beautiful place for tourism and resources to recover the environment.
In conclusion, the natural state of the area is important for wild animals and the ecosystem, and it should be protected. The best way to deal with this issue is that the government should take action by passing a law to preserve this wilderness as much as possible from people who want to make money from the lands.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 211, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'humans'' or 'human's'?
Suggestion: humans'; human's
... animals seem to have no relevance to a humans life; however, they have a greater role...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 402, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...atural state of the island by consuming a large number of resources, disturbing the sea animals, ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, however, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, well, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.5258426966 77% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.4196629213 121% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 14.8657303371 114% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.3162921348 80% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 36.0 33.0505617978 109% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 58.6224719101 94% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 12.9106741573 101% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2355.0 2235.4752809 105% => OK
No of words: 476.0 442.535393258 108% => OK
Chars per words: 4.9474789916 5.05705443957 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67091256922 4.55969084622 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65768425671 2.79657885939 95% => OK
Unique words: 231.0 215.323595506 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.485294117647 0.4932671777 98% => OK
syllable_count: 735.3 704.065955056 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 6.24550561798 144% => OK
Article: 11.0 4.99550561798 220% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.2370786517 119% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 44.1691626653 60.3974514979 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.125 118.986275619 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.8333333333 23.4991977007 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.29166666667 5.21951772744 121% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.13820224719 136% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.153689805837 0.243740707755 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0482056093957 0.0831039109588 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0538426553465 0.0758088955206 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.12419991863 0.150359130593 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0494695423205 0.0667264976115 74% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 14.1392134831 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 48.8420337079 124% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.1743820225 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.43 12.1639044944 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.9 8.38706741573 94% => OK
difficult_words: 100.0 100.480337079 100% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 11.8971910112 88% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.7820224719 85% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.