People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
The term "behavior" is quietly easy to describe. In general, "behavior" means how a person acts or reacts according to the external or internal forces. Thus, there is a statement that these external forces having solely constituted our behavior. Although it is no doubts that these forces play a vital role in making up our conduct, I believe that it is highly unjustified to say that.
On the one hand, human beings are the most intelligent species, have the liberty of choice and we can think, decide and execute things. Our decision and actions are made by our self. However, outside factors such as society, law, peer, family, etc, contribute to human behavior. History shows many flaw people were the product of these influences. For example, those people who live in the 1990s would still remember Linsey Lohan, a kid actress for Disney Production, she was considered as a young talented actress and nominated for best actress in a drama, however when she got fame and fortune, she had been degraded by these things, her career gradually went down and she committed to drug addiction. Nevertheless, there are some external factors such as laws, rules, and regulations in society were adopted because of practical purposes, but it depends on those who whether to abide by rules or not. For instance, in Singapore, there may be a punishment for throwing garbage on the road or smoke in the public places, nonetheless, thanks for these rules this nation has obtained many advantages such as it is one of the most hygiene countries all around the world and attracting more and more visitors.
On the other hand, in the end, it is completely dependent on us to make the decisions. We are our decision-makers. In this case, the sense of individual will come into crucial play. Although these rules, laws and outer forces continuously remind us against doing bad or illegal, there are people who break laws, which is evident by the crime rate. So, what are the effects of external force on such people? They have decided not to let the external forces determine their behavior. A thief will steal in spite of the laws in society. Many argue that their actions resulted from poverty, circumstances, etc, but it is eventually the thief who makes the decision. A person can only be responsible for his behavior. For instance, students are always told to study well for their bright future, however, not everyone follows that. External forces can play a part, but human beings are the outcome of their own actions.
In conclusion, the above statement is not entirely proper. Although we have to face many external forces and it no doubts that we are affected by them, human beings take the responsibility of whether letting or not these effects. So, I firmly believe that our action springs from our free will accord with common sense and everyday experience.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, may, nevertheless, nonetheless, so, still, thus, well, for example, for instance, in conclusion, in general, no doubt, such as, in spite of, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.5258426966 123% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.4196629213 64% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 14.8657303371 141% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.3162921348 124% => OK
Pronoun: 53.0 33.0505617978 160% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 51.0 58.6224719101 87% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 12.9106741573 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2394.0 2235.4752809 107% => OK
No of words: 486.0 442.535393258 110% => OK
Chars per words: 4.92592592593 5.05705443957 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69525374022 4.55969084622 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75845742547 2.79657885939 99% => OK
Unique words: 262.0 215.323595506 122% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.539094650206 0.4932671777 109% => OK
syllable_count: 756.0 704.065955056 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 6.24550561798 160% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.38483146067 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.2370786517 124% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 76.3226414637 60.3974514979 126% => OK
Chars per sentence: 95.76 118.986275619 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.44 23.4991977007 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.04 5.21951772744 135% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 7.80617977528 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 10.2758426966 107% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.83258426966 207% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.131950261857 0.243740707755 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0377655299295 0.0831039109588 45% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0351999140953 0.0758088955206 46% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0818346319214 0.150359130593 54% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0391489660858 0.0667264976115 59% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 14.1392134831 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.8420337079 107% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.1743820225 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.31 12.1639044944 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.28 8.38706741573 99% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 100.480337079 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.8971910112 67% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.