Some people believe that the purpose of education is to free the mind and the spirit. Others believe that formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.
Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented.
As students progress through the education system, their education becomes more and more formal, often at the cost of creativity and individuality. Compare the activities of fourth grade and 12 grade; one implemented creative projects, while the other focused on more rigorous analysis and constant tests. Additionally, the purpose of college has shifted from being an individual endeavor to one more restricted by higher institutions, due to the increasing price and popularity of such institutions. Instead of learning to broaden their knowledge, students are now increasingly focused on achieving the highest grade possible by any means, grade point averages and out-of-major requirements. Thus, I believe that the purpose of education was initially meant to free the mind and allow for creative individuality, but has now become more rigid, leading to generations of ordinary students.
Elementary school was characterized with projects, creativity, and individuality when I was growing up. However, the introduction of Common Core into the education system created significant changes. Students are now taught a "standardized" way of completing assignments and questions, and are often marked wrong if they do not follow these procedures, despite having the right answer. This system restricts students from thinking for themselves and forces them to follow a rigid instruction system, thereby limiting free spirit and mind. Additionally, as students progress from elementary school to high school, there are much fewer opportunities to express their own thoughts and individuality, which truly demotivates students. They are less inclined to view education as a positive means of expressing their knowledge and broaden their horizons and are more concerned with how they are going to pass their classes. Although initially, and in the past, education focused on creating free spirited and open minded students, educators and students alike are now increasingly focused on grades and following protocols set in place, which restrict students' ability to think for themselves.
Likewise, in the past, higher education was cheaper, and there were, consequently, less restrictions placed on students. They were allowed to pursue what they wanted without focusing on requirements outside of their preferred major. However, most students today spend an increasingly large portion of their college career focusing on achieving the highest grade, grade point averages, and out-of-major requirements. Take for example, the plight of women in higher education. They were not allowed to pursue a degree and often times took the classes simply to heighten their education. They were overlooked in classes and were not given credit for the classes they took. Although unfair, this exemplified what education meant to these individuals. It was nothing more than a method to open their minds to the limitless possibilities, a simple tool for learning more about the world and themselves. Fast forward 30 years, students now complain constantly about their workload and the amount of "unnecessary" classes they have to take to meet college requirements, and are often devastated when they do not achieve the grades they want, not because they did not learn the material, but because they are concerned about what it means for their future. This is probably due to the fact that higher education has become a staple in society, and is often time a necessity for success in the future. However, this necessity has sacrificed the true purpose of education. Comparing the two situations, it is easy to see how higher education has shifted from being a means to expand knowledge to, simply, a stepping stone for the future.
By comparing the differences of primary school and secondary school, as well as higher education in the past and higher education now, it is easy to see that the focus of education has shifted from creating individuals to simply passing on knowledge. Students of all ages are now concerned more with grades than actually learning the education, and are forced to learn material in a structured manner, reducing and necessity to think freely and for themselves. For these reasons, I believe that education was initially meant to allow students to free their mind and sprit by creating opportunities to express their individuality, but has been transformed into a rigid process that limits students freedom and causes them to lose their sense of individuality.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 225, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...ficant changes. Students are now taught a 'standardized' way of complet...
^
Line 5, column 84, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun restrictions is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
... cheaper, and there were, consequently, less restrictions placed on students. They w...
^^^^
Line 5, column 978, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...lain constantly about their workload and the amount of 'unnecessary' cl...
^^
Line 5, column 1639, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...imply, a stepping stone for the future. By comparing the differences of primary ...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, consequently, however, if, likewise, look, second, so, thus, well, while, for example, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.5258426966 154% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 12.4196629213 0% => OK
Conjunction : 37.0 14.8657303371 249% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.3162921348 80% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 53.0 33.0505617978 160% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 97.0 58.6224719101 165% => OK
Nominalization: 21.0 12.9106741573 163% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3802.0 2235.4752809 170% => OK
No of words: 697.0 442.535393258 158% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.45480631277 5.05705443957 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.13816675137 4.55969084622 113% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.08587743695 2.79657885939 110% => OK
Unique words: 311.0 215.323595506 144% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.446197991392 0.4932671777 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1182.6 704.065955056 168% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 6.24550561798 224% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.10617977528 193% => OK
Conjunction: 11.0 1.77640449438 619% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.2370786517 133% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 23.0359550562 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 70.4244821192 60.3974514979 117% => OK
Chars per sentence: 140.814814815 118.986275619 118% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.8148148148 23.4991977007 110% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.14814814815 5.21951772744 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 10.2758426966 156% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 5.13820224719 97% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.172734601011 0.243740707755 71% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0530095634373 0.0831039109588 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0591178084553 0.0758088955206 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.129423218414 0.150359130593 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0454057257788 0.0667264976115 68% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.1 14.1392134831 121% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 37.64 48.8420337079 77% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 12.1743820225 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.63 12.1639044944 120% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.66 8.38706741573 103% => OK
difficult_words: 167.0 100.480337079 166% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 16.5 11.8971910112 139% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.2143820225 107% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.