The administrators of a university are revising their budget and have decided to
change their funding priorities. As a result, the university will now spend more money on sports
and athletic facilities than they do on the campus libraries. Do you think this is a good idea?
Why or why not? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your position
Nowadays, the world has placed a premium on knowledge and skills one can obtain from higher education and joining a various array of activities. Although a multitude of people and academics advocate sports’ activities should be cancelled in exchange for more academic programs, others hold opposite perspective. I profoundly subscribe to this consensus that claims more budget should be dedicated to extracurricular activities such as sport. There are several reasons, two of which will be explained in the ensuing essay.
The first reason I should mention is that to keep abreast of 21st century, it is of paramount importance that students take in a collection of skills within a time frame. To be more specific, pupils are required to possess a wide range of skills, ranging from those learn in their own major, to those in another relevant subjects. Moreover, in the modern world the current employee has shown a tendency to recruit students who are able to do an array of jobs. Learners who dabble in a degree of skills will be employed in higher positions. In addition, learning new skills makes them both more creative and more active. Students playing a number of sports, as well as studying hard will be far much successful in the future. As a result, not only does it make them versatile, but it also helps them to match the needs of fast-changing and competitive society.
Another noteworthy and exquisite reason that I could add is that universities which are able to spend money on a wide range of activities are more popular than others among people. Some education systems failed to provide necessary facilities students need. While private universities outperform public universities based on their flexible programs and excellent extracurricular activities. Additionally, private universities are associated with quality facilities, professional teaching staffs, and excellent facilities. For instance, because of the high tuition fees, they are able to spend large amount of money on providing latest equipment for their gyms. It is critically importance, for qualification seekers are required to play sports alongside their studying. In order to have a healthier society, faculties are obliged to care about students’ both mental and physical health. Consequently, university staff should dedicate a budget for sports, besides improving libraries’ conditions.
To sum up, I am of approval of spending money on bettering the sport facilities, since students should acquire a collection of skills. Also, universities providing excellent facilities are more popular among people for pursuing education.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 619, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[2]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'providing the latest'.
Suggestion: providing the latest
... able to spend large amount of money on providing latest equipment for their gyms. It is critica...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, consequently, first, if, moreover, so, well, while, for instance, in addition, such as, as a result, as well as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 24.0 43.0788530466 56% => OK
Preposition: 61.0 52.1666666667 117% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2227.0 1977.66487455 113% => OK
No of words: 410.0 407.700716846 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.43170731707 4.8611393121 112% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49982852243 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.0130600121 2.67179642975 113% => OK
Unique words: 236.0 212.727598566 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.575609756098 0.524837075471 110% => OK
syllable_count: 698.4 618.680645161 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 30.1249852984 48.9658058833 62% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.047619048 100.406767564 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.5238095238 20.6045352989 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.7619047619 5.45110844103 124% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.235797370308 0.236089414692 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0603951127435 0.076458572812 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0413856423617 0.0737576698707 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.130602722607 0.150856017488 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0620886538968 0.0645574589148 96% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.9 11.7677419355 118% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.73 58.1214874552 75% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.21 10.9000537634 130% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.47 8.01818996416 118% => OK
difficult_words: 127.0 86.8835125448 146% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 86.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 26.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.