Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer
In today’s progressive and sophisticated world, where we live, no one can turn a blind eye to the significant effects of a famous person's lifestyle. In this regard, some people are inclined toward the opinion that Famous entertainers and athletes should protect their privacy. On the other hand, others think famous athletes the same as other people so they don't deserve privacy. Although both sides take their own position, Personally speaking, I firmly believe that the first group carries more weight. In the following paragraphs, I will cogently explain my reasons to justify my viewpoint.
To begin with, if famous entertainers and athletes protect their personal lives, they will be mentally healthy and have better intellectual abilities. In other words, when famous athletes have no margins in their lives and they don't have mental problems so that affects their performance in their job. Moreover, young people follow famous sportsmen then they were affected by a famous person. for example when people interfere in celebrities private lives and disturb them by some activities such as taking photos of the regular activities or broadcast fake news about them, their stress increasing hence they will show poor performance in their profession. As matter of fact, this bad performance of famous people affects youths' moods. Therefore, if they have a mental problem, they will be a bad performance in their duties and job.
The second reason coming to my mind is that when famous people preserve their privacy thus they have concentrated on their sports profession. To be more specific, since famous people protect their personal lives so they have been trying hard to achieve remarkable success in their lives. For instance, last year, one of the local television broadcasted fake news about the most famous soccer player and he was disturbed his focus. subsequently, he played angrily when they had a match in the champion world so he lost on that match. Hence, the more they concentrated on their job, the more they will try for success.
In conclusion, I strongly believe that protects the privacy of lives more beneficial and conducive for famous athletes to do exercise. Not only does it decreasing stress and improve their mental health, but they also concentrated on their job and duties effectively.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 131, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
... to the significant effects of a famous persons lifestyle. In this regard, some people ...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 359, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...hletes the same as other people so they dont deserve privacy. Although both sides ta...
^^^^
Line 3, column 229, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...have no margins in their lives and they dont have mental problems so that affects th...
^^^^
Line 3, column 394, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: For
... they were affected by a famous person. for example when people interfere in celebr...
^^^
Line 5, column 163, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... sports profession. To be more specific, since famous people protect their person...
^^
Line 5, column 433, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Subsequently
... player and he was disturbed his focus. subsequently, he played angrily when they had a matc...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, if, moreover, second, so, then, therefore, thus, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as, in other words, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 15.1003584229 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 51.0 43.0788530466 118% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 52.1666666667 71% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1951.0 1977.66487455 99% => OK
No of words: 376.0 407.700716846 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.18882978723 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40348946061 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.66565130223 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 201.0 212.727598566 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.534574468085 0.524837075471 102% => OK
syllable_count: 584.1 618.680645161 94% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.2526093451 48.9658058833 84% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.388888889 100.406767564 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.8888888889 20.6045352989 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.61111111111 5.45110844103 176% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.2194241398 0.236089414692 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.084749115563 0.076458572812 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0541491416302 0.0737576698707 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.144554742512 0.150856017488 96% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0256944009968 0.0645574589148 40% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 11.7677419355 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 58.1214874552 88% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.82 10.9000537634 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.03 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 86.8835125448 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.