Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Only people who earn a lot of money are successful. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
The definition of success depends largely on the belief of each person and the shared values among a particular society. A persons’ wealth, or the amount of money he/she possesses reflects his/her lifelong endeavor and represents for the accomplished achievement of this person is a critical indicator to evaluate his/her success. However, financial amount isn’t sufficient to determine whether a person obtains a particular degree of success, but rather it should assessed by the impact of their works on whole society and considering the fact that not all influential people are rich.
How many assets owned by a person cannot prove for his/her success, but the way he/she employs the resources to creates positive changes and improvement to the society matters. Firstly, a successful person needs to place a greater importance on the general benefits, rather than his/her own sakes. For example, a well-off manager cannot gain the veneration from his collogues and sub-coordinators if he/she just minds how to garner successful campaigns as the evidence for his achievement instead of taking care about the development of each member of the team and improving the working quality of his company. Secondly, there’s a multitude of millionaire in the world, but few of them can create changes in the society due to their lack of sufficient knowledge and capability. Specifically, many acquire their wealth by a stroke of luck or inherited from their parents, yet without education attainment and management ability, they cannot use the assets obtained properly. Furthermore, wealth accumulation is in the nature of human-beings and the desire to be rich may induce numerous evil deeds which become the negative side of money. For example, many people commit criminal by taking illegal businesses as the accommodation for their longing for money, of course success is not the term for those people. All in all, the wealth of a person cannot govern for his success, but it only can be obtained by his dogged determination to create changes for others in an appropriate manner.
Many come to wealth accumulation as the way to achieve successful career, but a lot of others show different manners of achieving the hall of fame. Some may argue that money is the fruit of the hard work and being emblematic for the amount of endeavor one exerts in his work. It is reasonable that behind all the successful firms and billionaire there is a story of hardship and sacrifice, thus the amount of fiscal resources one possess partially reflects his work and being the triumph of his success. However, as mentioned before, among a plethora of indicators to pinpoint a person’s endeavor, his financial status is just the one showing minor implication. His contribution to the general good, the extent to which his work positively change the world do matter, and all those strenuous tasks may not allow him/her to garner his/her own wealth. Indeed, various people who are widely venerated don’t keep for his own use any sum, as Kant once said “We are not rich for the things we possess but for the thing we can live without”. For instance, numerous scientists or writers whose work carrying out profound transformations of the world but they remain a poor financial status throughout their lives, yet who dare to question their success. Additionally, many activists devoting their whole lives to help others in creating a better world for all yet they do not take advantage of their reputation for any purpose of making money. Therefore, money may reflect the lifelong work of a person, but there are a plethora of other ways to create changes and marking a person’s achievement.
In conclusion, although financial status of a person provides a concrete evidence for his/her contribution and hard work, yet a variety of other factors need to be taken account to put a person in the hall of fame, especially the impact of his/her work on the society.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1466, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in an appropriate manner" with adverb for "appropriate"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...ermination to create changes for others in an appropriate manner. Many come to wealth accumulation as...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 158, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'argues'.
Suggestion: argues
...of achieving the hall of fame. Some may argue that money is the fruit of the hard wor...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, furthermore, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, well, for example, for instance, in conclusion, of course
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 31.0 13.8261648746 224% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 87.0 52.1666666667 167% => OK
Nominalization: 23.0 8.0752688172 285% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3332.0 1977.66487455 168% => OK
No of words: 652.0 407.700716846 160% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.11042944785 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.05314661074 4.48103885553 113% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.89342350551 2.67179642975 108% => OK
Unique words: 309.0 212.727598566 145% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.473926380368 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1043.1 618.680645161 169% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 11.0 1.86738351254 589% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 31.0 20.1344086022 154% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 47.6048073946 48.9658058833 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 158.666666667 100.406767564 158% => OK
Words per sentence: 31.0476190476 20.6045352989 151% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.04761904762 5.45110844103 129% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.048107109318 0.236089414692 20% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0183636345954 0.076458572812 24% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0150551309302 0.0737576698707 20% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0288202065797 0.150856017488 19% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0223327716165 0.0645574589148 35% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.2 11.7677419355 155% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.01 58.1214874552 69% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.4 10.1575268817 152% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.95 10.9000537634 119% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.15 8.01818996416 114% => OK
difficult_words: 164.0 86.8835125448 189% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 10.002688172 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.4 10.0537634409 143% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.247311828 146% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.