Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school.
Do you think this is a good idea?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Education plays a significant role in our kids' lives. Sometimes it becomes hard to persist and get a good result, so some parents found that if they reward their children with money, they will keep improving in their education. In my opinion, money paying for good grades is a wrong way for kids to continue; I feel this way for two reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
First of all, kids will depend on education as a way of earning money only. To be more specific, when parents give the kids cash as an incentive, kids used to study only to get money, not for reviewing itself. This way can prevent kids from getting in-depth knowledge; instead, they will get a superficial idea of the material they study. Additionally, they will not be enthusiastic about studying and, they will do their best to get money, which can lead to failure. For example, my cousin was rewarded by his parents when he got good grades.his parents consider this can be the right way of motivation for kids to get higher and higher grades. About four years ago, his parents, who were a source of money and motivation, passed away. As a result, my cousin has been getting low grades because he used to get something that he loves in a change of his effort at studying.
Secondly, kids are not reliable in money-saving. In other words, when a kid has much money, he can not decide which is good to spend the money on. So, he spends his money on unworthy stuff or unsuitable to their age. On the other hand, if kids do not have much money, they will not think about getting anything just small ones. My own experience demonstrates this problem. When I was young, my parents used to get me little money a day, but I was saving a lot for a few months. One day, I had much money and could not think about something worthy to get. I decided to get a remote control car, which is a waste of money because after a few days, it had been broken, and suddenly, all I had was nothing.
In conclusion, rewarding kids with money when getting high grades is not an excellent way to motivate them because it makes kids concentrate only on money instead of studying, and also they not able to save that money and use it well.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, secondly, so, thus, well, for example, i feel, in conclusion, as a result, first of all, in my opinion, in other words, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 43.0788530466 114% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1810.0 1977.66487455 92% => OK
No of words: 407.0 407.700716846 100% => OK
Chars per words: 4.44717444717 4.8611393121 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49157444576 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.41306663186 2.67179642975 90% => OK
Unique words: 200.0 212.727598566 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.4914004914 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 557.1 618.680645161 90% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 18.0 9.59856630824 188% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.6932850718 48.9658058833 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 95.2631578947 100.406767564 95% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.4210526316 20.6045352989 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.78947368421 5.45110844103 161% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.266348550959 0.236089414692 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0924140242737 0.076458572812 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0518678048072 0.0737576698707 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.185988957331 0.150856017488 123% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0310907948612 0.0645574589148 48% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.2 11.7677419355 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 67.08 58.1214874552 115% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.53 10.9000537634 78% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.63 8.01818996416 95% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 86.8835125448 87% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.