For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
it goes without saying that in this progressive and sophisticated world, people always has been engaged with multifarious tasks to provide the necessities of life. recently, there has been an active controversy over the very notion that whether education can brings us the opportunities and success in our career or having a good talent in networking is more crucial for our prosperity. although it is hard to reach a consensus on this issue, I personally adhere to the fact that being outgoing and associable is more important than studying hard in school. The following paragraphs will elaborate more on this issue.
To start with, it is incontrovertibly axiomatic that we should have a good ability to communicate with others in order to find a promising job in an acceptable company. After observing our resume and CV at first step, the employers pay attention to our ability to express out thought and ideas. because they know that the more we are able in networking, the more we can expand our work and progress in it. To put this in more vivid picture, let us consider an example. Last year my friend, sara, and I graduated from college at the same time. we both were so keen to find a job position in top-notch company in our town Isfahan. Since both we are the top student in our class, we had a great hope for acceptance. sara however was a very shy and introverted girl. In interview she rejected simply because they need a sociable employee. that year, nevertheless, I permitted to work in the highest rank company of our town. Had she had a little bit of interpersonal skills, she would have succeeded in his goals.
In another point of view, in our modern world, thanks to the advanced technological breakthrough, our jobs and careers are highly connected to computer, internet and social networks such as Telegram, Face Book, Instagram, to name but a handful. successful business men who have a good talent in communication, get use of these tools to make some advantages and expand their field of markets through the international scales. As a case in point, an in-depth study conducted in some developing countries demonstrated that in these five recent years, social media accept a pivotal role in the development of the international marketing for the majority of the global leading businesses. this cannot be feasible except with an appropriate communication skills and capability to relate well to people.
In conclusion, drawing upon the aforementioned reasons, although there are always some exceptions excluded from the general rule, in most of careers the ability to communicate efficiently to people is of the great importance. having interpersonal skills can bring us an array of merits. Not only does it a very salient role in being accepted by top ranked companies, but it also could help us to develop our business through the international scales.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
it goes without saying that in this progre...
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Line 1, column 81, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[7]
Message: The adverb 'always' is usually put between 'has' and 'been'.
Suggestion: has always been
...ressive and sophisticated world, people always has been engaged with multifarious tasks to prov...
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Suggestion: Recently
...sks to provide the necessities of life. recently, there has been an active controversy o...
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Line 1, column 260, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[2]
Message: The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: 'bring'
Suggestion: bring
... very notion that whether education can brings us the opportunities and success in our...
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Suggestion: Although
...ing is more crucial for our prosperity. although it is hard to reach a consensus on this...
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Suggestion: Because
...ility to express out thought and ideas. because they know that the more we are able in ...
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Suggestion: We
...raduated from college at the same time. we both were so keen to find a job positio...
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Suggestion: Sara
...ss, we had a great hope for acceptance. sara however was a very shy and introverted ...
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Suggestion: That
... because they need a sociable employee. that year, nevertheless, I permitted to work...
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Message: Reduce redundancy by using 'little' or 'bit'.
Suggestion: little; bit
...rank company of our town. Had she had a little bit of interpersonal skills, she would have...
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Suggestion: Successful
...Book, Instagram, to name but a handful. successful business men who have a good talent in ...
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Suggestion: This
...ority of the global leading businesses. this cannot be feasible except with an appro...
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Suggestion: Having
...y to people is of the great importance. having interpersonal skills can bring us an ar...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, nevertheless, so, well, in conclusion, such as, to start with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 52.0 43.0788530466 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 77.0 52.1666666667 148% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2410.0 1977.66487455 122% => OK
No of words: 484.0 407.700716846 119% => OK
Chars per words: 4.97933884298 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69041575982 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.9606161986 2.67179642975 111% => OK
Unique words: 277.0 212.727598566 130% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.572314049587 0.524837075471 109% => OK
syllable_count: 759.6 618.680645161 123% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 10.0 4.94265232975 202% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 64.3563812038 48.9658058833 131% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.545454545 100.406767564 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0 20.6045352989 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.18181818182 5.45110844103 77% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 5.5376344086 235% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.159678738648 0.236089414692 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0411361029465 0.076458572812 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.044516929108 0.0737576698707 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0976508549843 0.150856017488 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0512506845506 0.0645574589148 79% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 58.1214874552 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.6 10.9000537634 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.74 8.01818996416 109% => OK
difficult_words: 123.0 86.8835125448 142% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 10.002688172 150% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.