#TOEFL #iBT November 13, 2016
Do you agree or disagree? People can solve important problems by themselves or by their families; thus, it is almost not necessary to refer to the government.
It indeed undeniable that governments can help their own people in most aspects of their lives. Although some of my friends believe that it’s better to tell government our every problem, from my vantage point, it is appropriate to solve problems by ourselves or by the help of family and friends. Not only can we proceed fast, but also it can be helpful to the government. I subscribe this way for two main reasons which I will illustrate in the following essays.
The first exquisite point to mention is that we can reach to the solution fast. Obviously, if we want to solve the problem by the government, we will face with the paper works which sometimes is so difficult and long. Therefore, we have to allocate some time to solve our problems in a bureaucratic way. A vivid example can be shed light on this subject is my own experience. Once I wanted to take some facilities from the bank due to my financial problems, I had to provide lots of requirements then, I was regret. Consequently, I borrow some money from my family and several friends. Not only was don’t I have to return extra money, but I had sufficient time in giving it back. So, this view worked about my problem.
Another reason that deserves some words is that the government can concentrate other problems which are essential to all society. Logically, the government has a large amount of problems in a country which people can help government solve. In fact, one way of helping the government is that to solve some of our problems by ourselves. Consequently, the government will be able to solve lots of other rudimentary issues such as inflation, for example, which benefits to all eventually. I remember in one country, one time, its government declared that we have to be economical this year about energy. The subsequent reports confirmed that people helped the government overcome this issue. So, they have no long energy crisis.
To make long story short, I assert that people can solve their problems without the help of the government in the light of the aforementioned reasons. Not only will they escape from the long bureaucratic works, but also it will be helpful to the government. Actually, this way helps us and all society.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 282, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a bureaucratic way" with adverb for "bureaucratic"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...llocate some time to solve our problems in a bureaucratic way. A vivid example can be shed light on t...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 725, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e. So, they have no long energy crisis. To make long story short, I assert that ...
^^^
Line 4, column 304, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...lly, this way helps us and all society.
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, consequently, first, if, so, then, therefore, for example, in fact, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 55.0 43.0788530466 128% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 52.1666666667 96% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 8.0752688172 198% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1844.0 1977.66487455 93% => OK
No of words: 385.0 407.700716846 94% => OK
Chars per words: 4.78961038961 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4296068528 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76453700782 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 190.0 212.727598566 89% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.493506493506 0.524837075471 94% => OK
syllable_count: 574.2 618.680645161 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.994623655914 0% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.5847505908 48.9658058833 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 83.8181818182 100.406767564 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.5 20.6045352989 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.36363636364 5.45110844103 80% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.137379162658 0.236089414692 58% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0489235562944 0.076458572812 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0463505749864 0.0737576698707 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.103499653009 0.150856017488 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0271074889412 0.0645574589148 42% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.9 11.7677419355 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.21 10.9000537634 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.39 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 71.0 86.8835125448 82% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.