Of the two leading real estate firms in our town — Adams Realty and Fitch Realty — Adams Realty is clearly superior. Adams has 40 real estate agents; in contrast, Fitch has 25, many of whom work only part-time. Moreover, Adams' revenue last year was twice as high as that of Fitch and included home sales that averaged $168,000, compared to Fitch's $144,000. Homes listed with Adams sell faster as well: ten years ago I listed my home with Fitch, and it took more than four months to sell; last year, when I sold another home, I listed it with Adams, and it took only one month. Thus, if you want to sell your home quickly and at a good price, you should use Adams Realty.
The author claims that Adams Realty is superior real estate firm to Fitch Realty and argues that to sell home quickly one must use Adams Realty. However the argument is flawed because of the lack of sufficient evidence. The writer's argument is primarily based on the unwarranted assumptions that average sales and number of workers at Adams are more, rendering its main conclusion that Adams is better than Fitch weak.
First and foremost, author provides no historical data to support his point that Adams' revenue was consistently higher than Fitch for previous years. Last year's revenue at Adams could be an aberration. Moreover, more average could be due to one exceptionally high valued sale at Adams as compared to majority of the sales being of higher value at Fitch. Due to lack of sufficient statistical data and previous ten year records of sales for both the firms, the author's argument is weak.
Moreover, what was true 10 years ago is not necessary to be true in the current period. The author states that 10 years ago his home which was listed on Fitch took four months to sell as compared to 1 month time which Adams took to sell his house last year. It's possible that 10 years ago economy was in poor condition and all the real estate firms including Adams were performing miserably. There's no evidence to support the fact that 10 years ago Adams outperformed Fitch and has done so consistenlty for the last 10 years. Even if Adams was better than Fitch a decade ago, it does not imply that it is better than Fitch presently. Fitch could have improved its efficiency throughout the years. Only in the presensce of additional data can a credible conclusion be made.
Lastly, comapring the number of agents between the two firms would provide valid conclusion only when the efficiency of workers at two firms is comparable. Even if number of workers at Adams is more than at Fitch, it's possible that workers at Fitch are more experienced and talented which results in higher number of sales for Fitch. Moreover agents at Fitch could be selling properties at a faster pace than Adams. Just one example by author of his house being sold within a month last year cannot be generalized for all properties at Adams. May be because of significantly higher number of slighly less valued sales than Adams have resulted in Fitch's lesser average. Since author provides no evience to support the similar efficiency of employees at two firms, therefore his argument cannot be considered serious.
If author would have mentioned all the above arguments and rejected them with proper evidence, his argument would have been persuasive.But in the absence of proper proof his argument is unconvincing as it stands.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 463 350
No. of Characters: 2220 1500
No. of Different Words: 201 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.639 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.795 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.468 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 148 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 103 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 72 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 42 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.048 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.505 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.346 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.537 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.115 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 146, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...home quickly one must use Adams Realty. However the argument is flawed because of the l...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 225, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'writers'' or 'writer's'?
Suggestion: writers'; writer's
...of the lack of sufficient evidence. The writers argument is primarily based on the unwa...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 156, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'years'' or 'year's'?
Suggestion: years'; year's
...her than Fitch for previous years. Last years revenue at Adams could be an aberration...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 461, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ecords of sales for both the firms, the authors argument is weak. Moreover, what w...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 393, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: There's
...luding Adams were performing miserably. Theres no evidence to support the fact that 10...
^^^^^^
Line 13, column 335, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Moreover,
...ts in higher number of sales for Fitch. Moreover agents at Fitch could be selling proper...
^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 11, Rule ID: IF_WOULD_HAVE_VBN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'had mentioned'?
Suggestion: had mentioned
...t be considered serious. If author would have mentioned all the above arguments and rejected th...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 136, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: But
...his argument would have been persuasive.But in the absence of proper proof his argu...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, lastly, may, moreover, so, therefore, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 19.6327345309 148% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 55.5748502994 101% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2269.0 2260.96107784 100% => OK
No of words: 462.0 441.139720559 105% => OK
Chars per words: 4.91125541126 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63618218583 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.53540086158 2.78398813304 91% => OK
Unique words: 205.0 204.123752495 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.443722943723 0.468620217663 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 702.0 705.55239521 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.9450421352 57.8364921388 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.047619048 119.503703932 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0 23.324526521 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.61904761905 5.70786347227 63% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.284214955952 0.218282227539 130% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0997058222128 0.0743258471296 134% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0954223118631 0.0701772020484 136% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.17376793862 0.128457276422 135% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.117507907012 0.0628817314937 187% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.7 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 48.3550499002 119% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.2 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.15 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 100.0 98.500998004 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.