The luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life prevent people from developing into truly strong and independent individuals.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
It is dazzling to just look at some of the cutting-edge products and facilities. This develoment the of civilization, at least in a material aspect, altered the contmemporians’ way of living significantly differentiated from the people of the past. Although this change have had a salubrious effect on many respects, people became less hardy and independent.
Granted, it is evident that the conveniences of current life style allowed more free time to think about the themselves and chance to select their jobs nearly indefinitely. If the people properly find who themselves are and pioneer their way of living, these people would be strong and independent individuals. Take an example of the Youtubers today. They do what they want to and even make a living by doing so. In the past, such a thing couldn’t happen. They must have a few choices like a to become a farmer, merchants, and technicians. However, with the affluence of current society, society could allow those guys do whatever they prefer. These guys could feel self-satisfaction and because they follow the path they like, they feel more happy and therefore more healthy mentally or even physically.
However, it is entirely different story to those who fail to find true selves of them and get a career they want. Unlike the previous people, these guys could suffer from depression and even commit a suicide. This is because someone who could not find the true meaning of their lives will suffer from adverse mental problems. The people in the middle ages did not often face that kind of problem. They usually got a job according to the classes they belong or just follow the path of the ancestors. Unlike them, the contemporians suffer from self-recognition problem and even though someone finds the true self of him, there are still left plagues. To become what they want, they would be stressed by the competition. Even worse, if they became the loser of the competition, they could feel the bitterness of the defeat throughout their lives, making the mental illness like depression occur.
In conclusion, the luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life does not hamper people from becoming strong and independent people. Indeed, the opportunity to get such charactersictis are ubiquitous in this day and age. However, it is only a few people who could eventually get the chance.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 32, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
It is dazzling to just look at some of the cutting-edge products and facilities. T...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 107, Rule ID: DT_PRP[1]
Message: Possible typo. Did you mean 'the' or 'themselves'?
Suggestion: the; themselves
...e allowed more free time to think about the themselves and chance to select their jobs nearly ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, look, so, still, therefore, at least, in conclusion, kind of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 19.5258426966 51% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.4196629213 81% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 14.8657303371 114% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.3162921348 53% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 38.0 33.0505617978 115% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 58.6224719101 84% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 12.9106741573 54% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1981.0 2235.4752809 89% => OK
No of words: 390.0 442.535393258 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.07948717949 5.05705443957 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.44391917772 4.55969084622 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.95872215963 2.79657885939 106% => OK
Unique words: 207.0 215.323595506 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.530769230769 0.4932671777 108% => OK
syllable_count: 604.8 704.065955056 86% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 6.24550561798 240% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.2370786517 109% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 23.0359550562 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 40.337138108 60.3974514979 67% => OK
Chars per sentence: 90.0454545455 118.986275619 76% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.7272727273 23.4991977007 75% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.31818181818 5.21951772744 64% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 10.2758426966 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.13820224719 136% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.83258426966 103% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.086171972185 0.243740707755 35% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0293833343537 0.0831039109588 35% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0560372462298 0.0758088955206 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.070638710696 0.150359130593 47% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0518247574572 0.0667264976115 78% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.4 14.1392134831 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.8420337079 111% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.1743820225 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.89 12.1639044944 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.2 8.38706741573 98% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 100.480337079 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 11.8971910112 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.2143820225 78% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.