Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Educating children is a more difficult task today than it was in the past because they spend so much time on cell phone, online games, and social networking Web site.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Children can have bright future and contribute to society if they are educated properly. Governments should pay more attention to educational systems in order to improve them as they have vital role in encouraging young people to learn efficiently. With the advances in technology, this matter has become more difficult mainly because, in my opinion, the young generation spend a lot of their valuable time on many tempting facilities such as smartphones and the Internet. This essay will discuss this matter.
First of all, thanks to the new advances in technology, and in particular Information Technology, many people have access to the state-of-the-art facilities and various kinds of entertainment. These tools specially attract many young persons. Nowadays, many children have their own smartphones which allow them to pass the time by playing online games or surfing the Internet and using social networking services such as Facebook and Instagram. These interesting tools can waste a lot of time of people because. According to some research conducted at a prestigious university, young people spend almost 30 percent of their active time on social network websites. This may be a warning message to society because it needs to pay more attention to the future of children specially how well they educate. Children need to learn and develop many skills and improve their potential abilities to be capable of planning for their lives and collaborating with society. Therefore parents, teachers and advisors should collaborate to find an appropriate solution to this matter.
In addition, another significant point to be mentioned is that it has become more difficult for students to concentrate on their studies in classrooms. Many reasons may cause this phenomenon. One possible cause is that they do not find learning interesting like before mainly because the teaching methods are outdated and need to be improved. Another reason might be the fact that they are not concerned with their future. Having access to news about celebrities and famous people, these young persons may be reluctant to work harder to have a successful career and life. Again, the technology must be blamed because they are exposed to many entertainment resources and they prefer to spend their time having fun rather than focusing on a proper plan for life. For instance, I have a younger brother who just graduated from a university and it took more than 5 years for him to finish his education. When he was a kid, he was introduced to video games and since then, he always follow the latest technology in this industry which did prevent him from focusing accurately on his studies. This is another reason why society needs to think about a solution before it is too late.
In conclusion, people spend a lot of time on online entertainments using their cellphones computers. Specially, children who need to be educated properly, are wasting their time on these online services by chatting with their friends or playing games. Educational systems should be reviewed to eliminate possible flaws in order to make these young people more encouraged to pursue their education to succeed in life.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 963, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
...r lives and collaborating with society. Therefore parents, teachers and advisors should c...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 246, Rule ID: AFFORD_VBG[1]
Message: This verb is used with infinitive: 'to interest'.
Suggestion: to interest
...cause is that they do not find learning interesting like before mainly because the teaching...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 979, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'follows'.
Suggestion: follows
...o video games and since then, he always follow the latest technology in this industry ...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, may, so, then, therefore, well, for instance, in addition, in conclusion, in particular, such as, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 50.0 43.0788530466 116% => OK
Preposition: 75.0 52.1666666667 144% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.0752688172 149% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2671.0 1977.66487455 135% => OK
No of words: 515.0 407.700716846 126% => OK
Chars per words: 5.18640776699 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.763781212 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80716801948 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 256.0 212.727598566 120% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.497087378641 0.524837075471 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 840.6 618.680645161 136% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.7044888445 48.9658058833 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.291666667 100.406767564 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.4583333333 20.6045352989 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.875 5.45110844103 108% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 11.8709677419 152% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.183873887379 0.236089414692 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0555123667264 0.076458572812 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0385285840843 0.0737576698707 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.124464829597 0.150856017488 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.00822177370481 0.0645574589148 13% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.7 11.7677419355 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.82 10.9000537634 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.85 8.01818996416 110% => OK
difficult_words: 136.0 86.8835125448 157% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.