Some people believe that parents should pay their children a small amount of money to do jobs around the home (such as washing the dishes or taking out the garbage), while other people believe that parents should not pay their children to do these tasks
The procedures parents adopt to raise their children, are increasing concern in todey’s world, since they are future human resources of nataions. With this regard, many people may believe that in order to create a sence of cooperation and altruism in children, it is better to not involve money in their treating, so that they will learn, sometimes they should help others without any reward in return. However, others have the conviction that, parents should pay money their children in return of some assignments they do at home. I am unanimous with the latter group for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin with, paying children money for their contribution in house chores, will make them familiar with the most important rule of the world; which is, no pain, no gain. In other words, it will develop hardworking spirit in children, teaching them in order to achieve money, they should work . In addition, They embed this spirit in other aspects of their lives as they grow up. My cousin is a compelling example of this. When he was 7 years old, my uncle paid him for his cooperation in jobs at home. As a result, when he was 10, he dicided to buy his favorite bicycle by his own. At that time, not only he contributes more in house duties but he also begin to make ice cream for family members and his friends to get more money. This behavior has become one of his great attribute, and now he works realy hard to achieve his goals. Hence, had parents give their chilren money for what their contribution in house chores will develop an strong spirit in them to persue their goals.
Moreover, this way of treating encourages children to defend their rights when they become adult, while occupying several social roles in the society. Today, many individuals not only do not defend their right becouse of shyness, but also do not know about many of them. However, giving children money will undobtedly remove their shyness, building their confidence about financial issues. For instance, when I was a child, my parents never talk about money with me. They believe that money is not important, and humans should do many jobs for others without any expectation of a reward. As a result, now, I am working at a company, and I always have difficulty to talk with my boss about my wages, which is so low for the work I do. Therefore, paying children money for what they do, will help them defend their rights more effectively in the future.
To make a long story short, I strongly agree with paying children money for what they take on of house works. Because children learn to work hard to achieve their desires, and also because it will help them to be more confidence to defend their rights.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 16, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'parent'.
Suggestion: parent
The procedures parents adopt to raise their children, are incr...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 24, Rule ID: ADOPT_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'adapt to'?
Suggestion: adapt to
The procedures parents adopt to raise their children, are increasing co...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 294, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...order to achieve money, they should work . In addition, They embed this spirit in ...
^^
Line 3, column 656, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'begins'.
Suggestion: begins
...ibutes more in house duties but he also begin to make ice cream for family members an...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 938, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...ntribution in house chores will develop an strong spirit in them to persue their g...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, however, if, may, moreover, so, therefore, while, for instance, in addition, as a result, in other words, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 71.0 43.0788530466 165% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 69.0 52.1666666667 132% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2263.0 1977.66487455 114% => OK
No of words: 481.0 407.700716846 118% => OK
Chars per words: 4.70478170478 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68313059816 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.38217010783 2.67179642975 89% => OK
Unique words: 234.0 212.727598566 110% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.486486486486 0.524837075471 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 685.8 618.680645161 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 3.51792114695 256% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 5.0 1.86738351254 268% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.0262855566 48.9658058833 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.863636364 100.406767564 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.8636363636 20.6045352989 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.22727272727 5.45110844103 114% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.302649506371 0.236089414692 128% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.100614761664 0.076458572812 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0869440915561 0.0737576698707 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.214172591714 0.150856017488 142% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0711665293152 0.0645574589148 110% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 11.7677419355 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 67.08 58.1214874552 115% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.98 10.9000537634 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.34 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 86.8835125448 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.002688172 135% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.